Dear {you}....

The beginning of what I hope to continue...

"letters" to various moments of my life.

(here's some oldies)

Dear....

October '09 :: 

-Craigslist Scammers : you don't trick me!

-iPod Classic : stop playing the same songs over and over and over again...on shuffle!

-Other side of the tracks : I guess you're not so much "the other side of the tracks"

-Facebook : you seem to have broken since you, once again, changed the layout. thank you.

November '09 ::

-Blind Man : sorry I told you to 'watch your step' as I helped you across the street.

-Discount Website : you are not a discount website as your tickets aren't any cheaper than a regular website.

-Man in Elevator Lobby : I already pushed the elevator button, it is lit. you pressing it again, many times, will not make the elevator arrive.

-Customer Service : you outsourcing my call does not count as 'customer service'

-2009: thank you for being here for me and helping me laugh through everything, but now that you are almost over, I can NOT wait to put you behind me. bring it 2010!!!

December '09 ::

-Person using the dryer before me : check your pockets first, I could've stolen that 200 bucks! (but I didn't)

-Snow : two years in a row I miss my Christmas flight because of you!? come on!

-Ladies who wear heels in the snowy slush : what are you thinking?

January '10 ::

-Billing Agent : I can't pay the bill if you don't answer your phone or call me back!

-Stores within the depths of the NYC subway : how do you stay in business? who shops there?

February '10 ::

-Myspace : goodbye.

-Customer Service Rep : you do not know me. don't call me hon, sweetie, honey, sweets, doll...and anything else that is SO NOT professional!

-NYC : you smell like an old wet dog today.

March '10 ::

-Hershey's Syrup : stop tempting me with your chocolate milk goodness 

-Customer Service Rep : I am standing next to you, face to face! please don't tell me to 'call customer service' to help me with my issue!

-Customer Service Rep : I have been on hold with you for 20+ minutes just so you can fix what you already messed up on!? arg.

April '10 ::

-Beautician : I asked you to trim my hair, not cut off 3" and make it uneven with a Marsha Brady slope in the back.

May '10 ::

-Friends : your 4D baby pics are creeping me out.

-Home Depot : Just because I am a woman in your store does not mean I don't know what I'm doing...and it ESPECIALLY means I'm not there to pick guys up.

-People : is it too much to ask for you to do a job with ethical standards and at a top notch level?

-NYers : please look up when texting and do not run into me.

June '10 ::

-Old Women who shop in Forever 21 : don't.

-20 year old intern new to NYC with your hands full : it's not such a wise idea to carry 7 Starbucks drinks in their nice little carries and leave the last/8th slot open to carry your iPhone and credit card.

-Zac Efron and HSM : you have nothing on the old school awesomeness of "Grease"

July '10 ::

-Big Man with Lots of Hair and a Beer Belly: Just because it is a million degrees outside doesn't mean you don't need to wear a shirt.

-Woman pushing the stroller : don't put all of the groceries on the stroller canopy, just above the kid's head.

-Kid in line for Shakespeare in the Park tix: Yes, this play will be "all in that, like, Shakespeare language".

-Man with Stroller : You can not push the stroller through a revolving door. thank you.

-Woman trying to get in the elevator in the lobby : Just hold your horses! You think I wanna get back on this thing and ride back up with you!?