Open Mouth, Insert Foot.

The past two days I worked at the Javits Center at the Spa & Resort Expo & Conference.  A conference for folks who love beauty and medical treatments, along with your everyday Botox junkies.  (I can't even tell you how many scary Botox infused ladies, and men, I saw).

I was on the expo floor today walking around handing out flyers to the exhibitors.  One of the gentlemen told me that he unfortunately didn't enjoy this year's conference too much, it wasn't as big as last year, disappointed, blah blah.  I said "I'm sorry sir that it has been an unfortunate experience for you." ... or something along those lines to hopefully make him feel better.   Then I said, "So, what kind of product are you promoting?"  He told me how it was some sort of lazer buzz thingy that you put on your face, it helped take away wrinkles in minutes, yadda yadda.  Then, I say "oh, well, I'm one of those people that says just grow old gracefully anyways.  I'm getting older, but 'eh' whatever" .....

That's when I realized what I was saying....I was telling a guy at a spa & plastic face fest! that I thought folks should basically just go with the flow of aging!

oops! 

yeah, I won't be buying his product.

and, I didn't make him feel one bit better about his time at the show.

Dear Sir with the lazer face thingy : sorry I basically insulted your product.

Late?

The train always takes longer, there is always more traffic, people are always in your way...when you are running late.

Things I saw in NYC today....

-There was a man (in a wheelchair, with the pedestrian right of way) trying to cross the street.  
Another man (in a car, who had a handicap sign hanging visibly from his rear view mirror!!) was trying to turn the corner. 
The man in the car honked, many many many times, at the gentleman in the wheelchair to get him to hurry across.....uh, you think the man in the car would've have more sympathy!


-a little girl going to school :: little curls, pink shirt, pink pants, cute pink backpack with an elephant on it, dad carrying her dolly....and she was carrying her lunch box, with Spiderman on it.

Please oh Please!!!

someone's gotta tell these old fellers to just stop with the comb overs

Where's the Scar?

When I tell people I've had open heart surgery, the first reaction they have is to glance down on my chest.
They are looking for the scar.  They do not say it audibly, but the action certainly tells me what is going on in their head.
I will either just let it pass or say something.
This past weekend, I had one of those occurrences.

I was at a wedding, speaking with a friend I had not seen in a few years.  I noticed the glance and said "you were looking for the scar weren't you?" Embarrassed, my friend smirked and said "yeah, well...yeah!"  I then proceeded to tell him how the doctors did the surgery on my side and that the scar can not be seen. (pictures and further explanation of the procedure here).

This moment got me thinking...
In NYC we encounter 100's if not, at times, 1000's of people a day.
Do they have scars?
Some we can see, some not.
We all have a story, we have all been through something in our life...we all have scars.
From surgery, to break-ups, to accidents, to the bully in 1st grade.

Some embrace the scars, share the stories.  Some bury them deep down in a well of bitterness and mope.  It is up to us to decide which way we will turn.

Now I am not saying to go shout from the mountain top all of the problems you have ever encountered in your life, but do not be embarrassed by them either.  You never know who you might be able to encourage by sharing your story, by sharing your life.

I am still working on fully embracing all that I am, all that I have been through...but I realize that as I do so, others are comforted, others are blessed, and so am I.  I have a wonderful, supportive, amazing husband who loves me dearly because 5 years ago I decided to let down some walls and share some 'scars'.  I also have some FANTASTIC friends that I know I can depend on.
I move forward in the support, in the healing.

I desire that in sharing these stories that I will raise awareness on stroke and heart disease, but to also raise hope.

"Change is inevitable, growth is intentional."  -Glenda Cloud

Ways I Confuse my Huz

I love watermelon flavored candy,
but hate watermelon.

I love raspberries, strawberries, & cherries, & raspberry or strawberry or cherry flavored candy as well as raspberry or strawberry or cherry flavored drinks,
but hate raspberry or strawberry or cherry flavored ice cream, the green supposedly 'strawberry flavored' gummy bears, or anything filled with raspberry or strawberry or cherry goop.

I love black licorice,
but hate black jelly beans.

I love oranges,
but hate orange flavored candy or ice cream.

I love boston cream pie, 
but hate boston cream filled donuts.

I am a carnivore,
but will not eat meat on pizza.

Yup, there is likely lots more on this list,
& yes, my poor huz gets so confused.

Dear {you}....

The beginning of what I hope to continue...

"letters" to various moments of my life.

(here's some oldies)

Dear....

October '09 :: 

-Craigslist Scammers : you don't trick me!

-iPod Classic : stop playing the same songs over and over and over again...on shuffle!

-Other side of the tracks : I guess you're not so much "the other side of the tracks"

-Facebook : you seem to have broken since you, once again, changed the layout. thank you.

November '09 ::

-Blind Man : sorry I told you to 'watch your step' as I helped you across the street.

-Discount Website : you are not a discount website as your tickets aren't any cheaper than a regular website.

-Man in Elevator Lobby : I already pushed the elevator button, it is lit. you pressing it again, many times, will not make the elevator arrive.

-Customer Service : you outsourcing my call does not count as 'customer service'

-2009: thank you for being here for me and helping me laugh through everything, but now that you are almost over, I can NOT wait to put you behind me. bring it 2010!!!

December '09 ::

-Person using the dryer before me : check your pockets first, I could've stolen that 200 bucks! (but I didn't)

-Snow : two years in a row I miss my Christmas flight because of you!? come on!

-Ladies who wear heels in the snowy slush : what are you thinking?

January '10 ::

-Billing Agent : I can't pay the bill if you don't answer your phone or call me back!

-Stores within the depths of the NYC subway : how do you stay in business? who shops there?

February '10 ::

-Myspace : goodbye.

-Customer Service Rep : you do not know me. don't call me hon, sweetie, honey, sweets, doll...and anything else that is SO NOT professional!

-NYC : you smell like an old wet dog today.

March '10 ::

-Hershey's Syrup : stop tempting me with your chocolate milk goodness 

-Customer Service Rep : I am standing next to you, face to face! please don't tell me to 'call customer service' to help me with my issue!

-Customer Service Rep : I have been on hold with you for 20+ minutes just so you can fix what you already messed up on!? arg.

April '10 ::

-Beautician : I asked you to trim my hair, not cut off 3" and make it uneven with a Marsha Brady slope in the back.

May '10 ::

-Friends : your 4D baby pics are creeping me out.

-Home Depot : Just because I am a woman in your store does not mean I don't know what I'm doing...and it ESPECIALLY means I'm not there to pick guys up.

-People : is it too much to ask for you to do a job with ethical standards and at a top notch level?

-NYers : please look up when texting and do not run into me.

June '10 ::

-Old Women who shop in Forever 21 : don't.

-20 year old intern new to NYC with your hands full : it's not such a wise idea to carry 7 Starbucks drinks in their nice little carries and leave the last/8th slot open to carry your iPhone and credit card.

-Zac Efron and HSM : you have nothing on the old school awesomeness of "Grease"

July '10 ::

-Big Man with Lots of Hair and a Beer Belly: Just because it is a million degrees outside doesn't mean you don't need to wear a shirt.

-Woman pushing the stroller : don't put all of the groceries on the stroller canopy, just above the kid's head.

-Kid in line for Shakespeare in the Park tix: Yes, this play will be "all in that, like, Shakespeare language".

-Man with Stroller : You can not push the stroller through a revolving door. thank you.

-Woman trying to get in the elevator in the lobby : Just hold your horses! You think I wanna get back on this thing and ride back up with you!?

What is so hard about the word "trim"?

I REALLY needed a trim a couple weeks back, so I thought "I'll just shoot across the street & get a quick trim. They can't hurt my hair too much by just cleaning it up"....boy oh boy oh boy was I WRONG.

I get to the salon- there is a woman there who looks pretty hip and capable of cutting my hair...then she passes me along to a 70+ year old woman who didn't speak English (having a language barrier when trying to communicate to someone how you want your hair is not ideal...)

The 70+ lady then proceeded to 'wash' my hair.  She tugged and shoved my head in various directions, got water all down my face and in my eyes, and I didn't even get that nice head massage always given when your hair is washed.

I ask for my hair to be TRIMMED! ...the woman cuts some off, shows it to me, and gestures as if to say "is that ok? good?" (remember we have the aforementioned language barrier happening...)  I look at the chunk she cut off (pretty close to 4-5 inches) & I say "no, no that is way too much!!!" Now of course the woman didn't understand what I was saying so the 'hip' lady had to try and translate for me.
The rest of the cut seemed to proceed pretty well with my head being yanked around only a small number of times...but then....

As the woman went on to dry my hair I ask to have it diffused, so that it will be curly (my hair varies depending on how it's dried).  Again, we have the language barrier and ms. hip helps us again.  Moments later....my hair is dry.  It is uneven. It is 3 inches shorter.  and I look like Farrah Fawcett.

I realize now that I should have walked out of the salon as soon as my head was tugged around as it was being washed.  But, alas, now I know my lesson.
Don't just 'pop-in' to a salon hoping to get a nice safe quick trim.

Gummi Bear??

The other day I saw this girl on the subway and I couldn't help but to try and sneak a pic.
After many tries and a with major zoom from my less than perfect cell camera...I got it.
Here she is...know who this reminds me of?
Anyone? Anyone?

"I bet you never smelled a real school bus before... Gummi bear? It's been in my pocket; they're real warm and soft."

I certainly couldn't stop laughing to myself! Was it because she still had the major 80's glasses, haircut, and wardrobe? Was it thinking of the many times I've watched this movie with my sister as we quote along? Was it then thinking of the many moments I've spent with my sister just laughing for no reason at all?
Probably...all of the above.

I also knew it certainly was a good thing that my sister was not with me on the subway, we would've laughed like little girls do in church when they're not supposed to be laughing...
And I definitely knew it reminded me of how much I love my sister & how she's always been there for me to laugh and laugh and laugh with thru good and bad.

Didn't think this blog was gonna get all sappy...

but I LOVE MY SISTER!!!!

postscript: this blog was actually named with my dear sis and our fun times in mind...

Just call me Andy Millman...

Andy Millman is my name

being an 'extra' is certainly not my main game....

but! I have started doing it a wee bit.

I've always been intrigued by the world of film and TV and doing extra work is a nice way to weazel your way into it to learn...and get paid!

With it though, goes the professional extra's.
(there's even a documentary about them)

Me oh my...they are some characters.

Here's the honorable mentions (and only after 2 days):

-the guy who with every conversation found ways to tell me all about all of his extra work. what he did, who he ran into, and what movie he was 'in'

-the gal who spoke of all of the 'roles' the casting director called her for, that she missed. all the while, talking loud enough so that everyone in holding could hear her (tho the 'roles' she spoke of were those like: gal at the bar, woman with stroller, things like that...)

-and of course there are the many who 'compete' with one another to be in just the right spot so the camera can see them pantomiming just perfectly

-and those who pretty much just drool over seeing the famous actor we are working with (instead of remembering that said famous person is a just human being and that, yes, we can talk to them like regular humans)

and my favorite of them all...

-the gentleman who was Indian and was proud to tell me that "because he was Indian" one of his "dream roles [as an extra and as an Indian]" was to be a terrorist on 24.  wow.

yes, of course there are those of us that are there to learn, to get some on set experience, and to maybe just maybe become BFF's with the PA. Who maybe just maybe like you lots and want to use you more. And then maybe just maybe you'll be in the right spot at the right time...and maybe just maybe they'll want to give you a line or 2...

yes, this would be super cool...a gal can dream....

And of course, I also have to admit that I did enjoy my brief interaction with Jeff Goldblum where he had me read a script with him that he was working on.  This lasted all of 2 minutes, but yes, it was fun.  :)

I am certainly loving the experience and the things I'm learning on set, yet I have no intention of becoming an professional extra.

But maybe just maybe...I may become BFF's with the PA and who knows....????

until then, look for the blur walking by on Law and Order. 

Overheard on the Subway...

A conversation I overheard on the subway train today...
Man on his phone:
"Hey man! What's up!?
Yeah, I'm late. Sorry.
Train...Ya know!!!?
Yeah, Yeah, I'll be there soon though!
In about 45 minutes or so."

45 minutes!?
"soon" ???
really?

OH, the Subway

In the last week on the MTA Subway System I saw:

a young woman who was inside the tunnel,
forgot her umbrella was up.

a man carrying a saw...creepy!

A New Kind of Church Experience

I went to a church tonight to check out their mid-week service and had an experience like never before...

First of all, the church does not have their own building, so they meet in different locations throughout the city.
Tonight, they were at the Manhattan Center.  A building that hosts various events during the week, one being church.

I got off the subway (right at the corner, where the Manhattan Center is) and thought something might be up as I walked towards the venue.
There were many hippies in the street and on the sidewalk and you could smell the strong scent of marijuana as doobies filled the air with smoke.
stink.
I thought, maybe it was just a crew of college kids waiting to get back on the buses that lined the streets, yeah ignorance.  I just wasn't sure.

I walked closer to the venue and the crowds got bigger.
I walked up to one of the doors that looked like an entrance, asked the woman at the door if I was in the right place for church, she directed me to the doors a few yards down.
I made my way through the crowds, that got bigger as I progressed, towards the line, and proceeded through the barricades.
I thought, "wow! this is amazing! so many people showing up for church! and it's so crowded that they need security!"
(did I mention this was my first visit to this church and it's location?)

I went through security, they checked my bag, and asked if I had a ticket "huh? a ticket? for church?"
ok, then I def knew my ignorance was getting the best of me.
As the security guard asked for my ticket I said "for church?"
She looked at me, smiled, and pointed me in the direction of the door I had come from, the door where the first woman directed me to the line of barricades with security.
oh boy.
I finally made it back to the first door, asked the first lady if I was in the right spot for church and she apologized for thinking I was not there for church.
ahh....I was in.
I went inside, up the stairs and was ready to sit down.
Though, again, I was in the wrong place.
The smell of pot got stronger and the noise from whatever concert was there got louder.
Back down the stairs.
I once again went back to the lady (that kept directing me to the wrong places) and told her I had no clue where I was going.
duh.
She finally pointed me in the right direction, I was on the elevator headed to the eighth floor, and then in the Grand Ballroom.
now, I sat.
Church was awesome, the preacher was fantastic and I sat next to some lovely ladies.

Then, it was time to go!
Instead of taking the elevator back down (because there was only one for the many folks at the service) I decided to walk down the stairs...the smell of pot was really really strong as I went more and more flights down to ground level. The concert was in full force.
I made it to the ground level, saw the lady at the front door that had lead me with so many misdirected directions (some front door greeter she was), thanked her for her help, and made my way outside taking a big breath of fresh air.
Never once did I think I would go to church and have the stale stench of pot lingering on my clothes.

In the future...
I now know the Manhattan Center has two venues inside: the Grand Ballroom (where church was) and the Hammerstein Ballroom (where the concert was).

I also found out what the concert was...Joe Russo, whoever that is.
I enjoyed church and got my fill of some good preaching.
The concert attenders went to a show and got a whole other high.

Church like none other.

Could've been 200 bucks richer

It's a good thing I'm an honest gal...

When at the laundromat there is an unspoken rule:

If the person using the machine before you does not come back for awhile to claim their goods you have the right to empty the machine out & put your stuff in.

Today this happened to me.

I waited for about 15-20 minutes after the dryer was done...waited...the woman did not come back.

So, I emptied her dryers & used them.

Upon emptying the dryer with many pairs of jeans,

I found $200 cash.

I'm assuming she didn't check the pockets before loading in the dirties?

I just stuffed the cash within the pile of clothes...what else to do?

But, she came back eventually (another 10 minutes later) & I told her what I found.

She was grateful.

Merry Christmas lady! & Happy Holidays!

Subway Observations...

The other day on the subway I saw:

-a woman strumming her guitar on the 7 train (in Queens) who I used to see ALL the time when I lived on the Upper West Side, 9 years ago.

-a homeless man helping a blind man onto the train

-a man on the platform tossing bread to the rats

yes, all on the same day.

all in a days work...

Open or Closed?

It's signs like this that make me confused...
perhaps it should say "Yes, We're Lazy"

Rambo

While watching Rambo in Spanish tonight (a language my husband doesn't speak), he says "some movies just don't need words".
So true.

It's a hard-knock life...

There was a guy in Staples the other day yelling many things...it was hilarious:
-can someone help me here!
-I need to make a copy & I don't know how to use these machines, you [the sales clerk] need to help me.
-It used to be so easy in the old days! You'd hand them a piece of paper, tell them how many copies you wanted made & it was done!
-What does someone have to do to get a copy made around here!!!

I wish I had a video.

Madonna

Last time I checked...Madonna was from Michigan.
So, uh...why is she speaking with an English accent?
(Also here.)

Notes from a flight...

Ok, so it's been QUITE awhile since I've posted...but the holidays gave me plenty of fodder.

Here goes:
I love to observe, watch, notice, take note, & of course make fun of folks on flights...it's the best place to people watch.
On my & Joel's flight to El Paso for Christmas on December 18, 2007 we had an early morning flight to Chicago for a quick layover & then proceeded to El Paso. Our flight left at 7:55am & arrived in Chicago at about 9am, getting all of the 'suits' on the flight into Chicago just in time for that 10am business meeting.
Joel & I were quite tired & planned on getting a nice cat nap on the way to Chicago...yet, we couldn't really plan on that. There was one Suit who liked to talk quite loudly, making sure that everyone else on the flight knew she was there & what she thought of everyone she worked with, along with her other thoughts on life, love, politics, and cashmere.
She was just two rows behind us.
Just as the Flight Attendant was about to close the door & we would be requested to put on our seatbelts, I asked Joel if he could help me get a blanket from the overhead compartment. Joel, being the wonderful helper & chivalrous husband he is, got up & retreived a blanket, just above Ms. Suit. As he reached up & grabbed the item that would keep me warm & cozy for the first leg that began our holiday vacation, Ms. Suit made note of this & said to her friend in a low, hushed voice yet certain that she was loud enough that we could hear her:
(Picture her with me -- a well dressed woman, perfect hair, make-up, pumps, & Coach bag with that nice Upper East Side 'I can purchase anything I want' attitude & way of speaking...similar to Meryl Streep in Devil Wears Prada)
"You know, I can't use THOSE blankets anymore & I travel SO much that I bring my own. A $325 cashmere Vanity Fair blanket. Cashmere, it's SO soft & nice!!!"
I was about to turn around & ask Ms. Suit if I could borrow the aforementioned blanket, but instead I warmed up with my non-cashmere blanket & got some nice quick shut eye to begin what was a wonderful Christmas vacation with my new in-laws in TX.